Moments.

As a member of society of the female teen demographic, I am excepted to play into the hands of romantic movies and end up crying about the lack of good men and how "I'll never find anyone like him!" Only, my "him" is Rhett Butler. There is no reason to deny that we have ALL had this moment, regardless of how many "I don't need a man to complete me!" moments we have had. I happened to have one of those moments on Saturday.

I was sitting in a Papa's and Beer booth, waiting for my food to arrive, surrounded by three of my friends. Hali, Laudan, and Tiffany. Hali and Laudan were sitting discussing their boyfriends and the dates they had been on recently and all that jazz. Tiffany was sitting there, nodding along in agreement with their shared stories. I simply stirred my straw in my 27 ounce margarita, desperately trying to avoid the question that was bound to come next. "So, Alexis....what about you?"

The dreaded question. Since I am now 16 and a junior, it is becoming expected that I shall have some type of romantic interest in my life. Yet, this is not the case.
 "Well, I've never had a real* boyfriend, and I've never been on a date." I quietly sipped on my water.
"Oh, yeah..." They picked up back on their conversation.

Moments like this make me think back on my life and question how I am seemingly the only girl in the entire planet without a boyfriend. Then, I realize, I have set myself up for this. I have way to many friends of the male persuasion and I would rather wear sweats than a dress and heels at almost any given moment. Does this make me an unappealing tomboy?

Of course not! I like to wear mascara. I like to watch The Notebook and gush about how hot male actors are. I like to pretend that I am Scarlett O'Hara and that Rhett is coming to save me from a swarm of Yankees at any minute. I even used to do a bit of modeling.

Do I mean to brag about all this? No. My entire point is this-there will be moments when you feel like you desperatly need a man to make you feel whole. It's a lie. Look around at your friends in relationships, and I can garenttee you at least one is unhappy 50% of the time because of their siginificant other. Besides, if you're in a relationship, how are you going to unabshadly flirt with your cute Mexican waiter?


*real as in longer than two weeks- and middle school "boyfriends" don't really count.

Dying Slow

Rain makes me think about things. Today, it made me think about something that is always looming in the back of my mind.

Every single day you live, you are closer to your impending death.


Besides the obvious morbidity of the sentence, it made me think of something else. You really can't bide your time waiting for things to happen. You are only given so many years on this place called Earth, and you will never know if today is your last. Although this is clearly an overused statement, and maybe even a platitude, it still made me realize something.

Eloise, of Eloise in the Plaza, is a freaking beast. She takes life by the horns and just goes. I have decided that I need to be more like her. She may be officious, but at least she knows what she wants. And by golly, she goes after it. From now on, I'm going for what I want. After all, I'm only that much closer to dying anyway.